Ever since I saw The Professional I’ve thought owning a plant of some sort would be pretty cool. A plant is kind of like a pet only it doesn’t need much care besides water, there’s no training required either. Considering the ol’ H20 is not expensive stuff even someone such as myself could afford plant ‘food’. (One day I’d like to own a dog, you know… a real pet. But I need time to train it. I refuse to be like so many pet owners that seem to expect the animal to be amazing without any guidance. It doesn’t work with pets and it doesn’t work with children.)
I digress. A plant is a simple thing to take care of and receive a little joy in return–if it thrives that is. Why hadn’t I purchased a little greenery until today? Because for the most part pants aren’t very interesting. Maybe they’re big and leafy (no thanks, where would I put that?) Or they’re small and dull. Or a cactus. I grew up in Arizona, I’m set on cacti. I’ll pass. But a plant that eats stuff? A plant that’ll gobble up living things? A plant that kills? Now that’s pretty darn cool! It only ran me $5 too!
“Are these easy to maintain?” I asked the floral gal where I work. ”No. Not really. I had one and it died real fast. They need…” blah blah blah, I’ll Google what they need. Lots of sunlight, damp soil, and pure water is vital to their health. Tap water is no bueno. Rain water, distilled water, or reverse osmosis water is best for them. Humidity is a plus, but not a must.
‘Well heck,’ I thought, ‘I live in a basement; humidity is kind of a given down there. I work at a grocery store; I can get water of any sort any time I like. The sun? I live in Seattle. I don’t see much of that fellow. Screw it.’ And thus I bought a venus flytrap. I filled my water bottle with something even more pure than reverse osmosis, but added about a shot worth of the former too. Just… I don’t know, because. Why not!
You see, how this has anything at all to do with Tour de CONUS is that I hope to bring this lil fella along with me around the Washington Peninsula and The–main–Trip too. Put him in our tent so he’ll (yes, HE) eat bugs. If I can get him to survive. If not? Oh well. But I’ll try my darnedest!